Donald R. Gray

Shrewsbury - Rotary International’s motto ‘Service above Self’ accurately describes Don Gray’s life. Throughout his lifetime he gave to his family, friends, fellow veterans, the community of his much-loved Shrewsbury, God and his church.

 Donald Ralph Gray was born in Worcester a son of the late Ralph C. and Emma C. (Eccleston) Gray. Raised in Worcester’s Lakeview neighborhood he graduated from Worcester Technical High School and later earned a Bachelor’s degree from Clark University. Like many men his age he enlisted and served in the United States Naval Reserves from 1946 and then in the United States Army during the Korean War, exiting the service in August 1953. He married Northborough native, Marie Alta Butman on October 24, 1953, in the Congregational Church on Coburn Avenue in Worcester. Longtime Shrewsbury residents, they were married 69+ years until Marie’s death on January 27, 2023. 

Don died on Friday, November 8, 2024 at his home after a long illness. He was 95. 

His signature look of a military-like buzzed crew-cut, was his look all his life. Those who knew him easily recall he often would wear a bow tie while at work, church or a civic engagement. Don Gray will be remembered fondly as a gentle man and as a gentleman. Their home on High Street was a great place to raise a family. The entire family were entertained by the pool, softball, badminton or basketball games and a favorite, toboggan rides in the winters. 

Don began working with the Town of Shrewsbury in its Water Department where he served as Foreman. He left to work with his father in the family company, Ralph C. Gray Movers before returning to municipal government and assuming the position as Town Clerk in 1981, retiring at the end of January 2000. Among his many tasks were making certain elections run smoothly and ballots accurately counted. In addition, the number of birth, marriage and death certificates registered and issued by him were countless. He liked his work and was a respected colleague amongst the town’s administration and employees. 

Don was a longtime member, Deacon and Church Council member of The First Congregational Church. He was Past Master of the Matthew John Whittall Lodge of Masons in Shrewsbury and Senior Warden and Line Officer in the Worcester Lodge of Perfection of the Scottish Rite Bodies in Worcester and Springfield. He was also a member of the Scottish Rite and Aleppo Temple Shrine in Boston as well as the Alethia Grotto of Worcester and Past President of the Patrol. Don was also a member of the Colonial Degree Team of the Colonial Massachusetts, a Past Commander of the Ray Stone Post #238 American Legion, served as Commissioner of Shrewsbury’s Veterans Council, the WWI Memorial Committee and the Soldier’s Memorial Commission.

Don was an active member of the Shrewsbury Rotary Club and a Paul Harris Fellow. Don and Marie enjoyed traveling extensively with Rotary to numerous countries throughout Europe, as well as many other trips in the states and abroad in search of information for his extensive search for his family ancestry, which was an ardent passion. Annual vacations to family homes in both Wells and South Bristol, Maine created many memories. 

In addition to his wife, Marie, he was predeceased by their daughter, Robin Butman Gray, his mother and father, Emma E Gray and Ralph C. Gray and his sister, Virginia Bartlett. 

Don leaves his children, Donna M. Gray-Hanc (David) of Jefferson, Maine, Peter D. Gray of Shrewsbury, Cindy Gray Eckert (Jim Emmons) of Deland, Florida, Diane J. Gray of Whittier, North Carolina and Brian C. Gray (Cathy) of Saco, Maine; his grandchildren, Harmony Eckert, Angel Eckert, Jocelyn Hanc (Megan Marlow), Zachary Ferguson (Sydney), Ryan Hanc (Morgan), Emily Gray, Shaina Ferguson and Erin Gray; his great-grandchildren, Willow, Alek, Andromeda, Kingston and Jaxon; sixteen nieces & nephews. 

Family and friends will honor and remember Don’s life by gathering on Friday, November 22nd for a morning wake in the Parlor at First Congregational Church, 19 Church Road, Shrewsbury from 10 – 11 a.m. followed by his funeral service at 11 a.m. in the church. The Rev. Holly MillerShank will officiate. Burial with military honors will follow in Mountain View Cemetery followed by a collation in Gifford Hall at the church. 

Members of the Matthew John Whittall Lodge of Masons will conduct their ritual at the beginning of Don's funeral service at 11 a.m. 

Those wishing to view the livestream of Don's service please use this link: https://www.fccsm.org/livestream

Memorials in Don’s name may be made to Shriner’s Children’s Hospital, 516 Carew St, Springfield, MA 01104 or https://www.shrinerschildrens.org/en/locations/new-england

Arrangements by James + John Heald of The Joyce Funeral Home, 245 Main Street, Waltham.